Temu's "Attack Dog" Robot Prepare for Utter Weirdness

We Bought a ‘Peeing’ Robot Attack Dog From Temu: Prepare for the Absurd!

After 15 years of diving headfirst into the world of tech, I thought I'd seen it all. Then, a slightly battered box arrived, courtesy of a late-night Temu impulse buy, and I met Clippy. Yes, Clippy – a pellet-firing, story-telling, pretend-urinating robot attack dog. This, my friends, is easily the strangest gadget I've ever reviewed.

The box itself was a warning sign, emblazoned with the words "FIRE BULLETS PET." Inside, nestled behind a thin plastic window, was Clippy, radiating the unsettling innocence of a plastic newborn lamb – a plastic destroyer of worlds, according to the box. My four-and-a-half-year-old son immediately (and inexplicably) christened him Clippy, and thus, a bizarre adventure began.

Clippy is, ostensibly, a robot dog. Or, at least, a vague approximation of one. Clearly inspired (and I use that word loosely) by the impressive, and sometimes unsettling, robotic canines of Boston Dynamics, Clippy aims for the stars but lands somewhere closer to… well, a discounted moon.

For a mere $50 (less if you forgo the, ahem, spinal-mounted pellet gun), expectations were appropriately tempered. However, my weakness for Instagram ads promising animatronic wizardry at bargain-basement prices proved too strong to resist. The result? A valuable lesson in believing everything you see online. But also, a hefty dose of ridiculous fun.

Lab Notes: Dissecting the Plastic Beast

Unboxing Clippy was an experience in itself. I was immediately greeted by the lightest, cheapest, glossiest plastic imaginable.

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a good plastic build. The Nokia Lumia 920's polycarbonate body remains a design icon in my book. But Clippy? Clippy and his accompanying remote offer a durability level comparable to a Christmas cracker toy.

While Clippy’s main body, housing the majority of his electronics, has some reassuring weight, his spindly legs inspire little confidence. They don't appear capable of supporting much, especially considering I opted for the turret-toting model, promising to unleash a barrage of water-absorbent pellets upon unsuspecting enemies (more on that later).

Ultimately, Clippy resembles an elongated CCTV camera on legs, topped with a turret. In terms of aesthetics, he's surprisingly close to Boston Dynamics’ creations, at least from a distance and with your eyes half-closed.

Here's a quick rundown of Clippy's key features (or lack thereof):

• Build Quality: Think disposable party favor, not robotic companion.
• Mobility: Picture a wobbly toddler learning to walk.
• Firepower: The pellet gun is more amusing than menacing.
• "Peeing" Function: Yes, you read that right. Let's just say it's… creative.

The Verdict: A Laughing Stock, But an Endearing One

Clippy is not going to replace your family dog. He's not going to revolutionize robotics. And he's certainly not going to intimidate your neighbors. What he will do is provide you with a story to tell and a healthy dose of laughter. In a world of increasingly serious technology, Clippy is a welcome reminder that sometimes, the most ridiculous gadgets are the most memorable. So, if you're looking for a weird and wonderful addition to your tech collection, and you don't mind a bit of questionable plastic, Clippy might just be the robot attack dog for you. Just don't expect him to win any battles.

Tags: Robot dog, tech review, funny robot, Clippy, Temu find, robot toy, pellet gun, weird tech, Boston Dynamics, toy review

Source: https://www.wired.com/story/we-bought-a-peeing-robot-attack-dog-from-temu/